Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
