No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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