Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
