Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
