Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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