I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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