i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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