the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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