Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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