I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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