im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize