Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
