Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
