i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
