So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize