dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
