whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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