Im at strip club and am horny
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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