I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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