My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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