wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
