But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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