Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you traded sex for a burrito?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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