2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
