I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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