his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
