Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
