I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
