Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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