I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
