Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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