Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm like, not good at living.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
