Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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