dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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