Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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