I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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