We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
