Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
