Whod you bang
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
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