Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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