so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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