its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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