I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
My ass is underappreciated
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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