Well apparently he's into motor boating.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Randomize
