That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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