porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
