I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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