White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
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