haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
and i looked up. we had an audience...
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
