Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
